You Broke It, You Bought It, Pt. 1

“You Broke It, You Bought It, Pt. 1,” Ep. 197

🚽✨ In this absurdly hilarious episode of our sci-fi comedy podcast, “You Broke It, You Bought It, Pt. 1,” chaos reigns as Sooperflea and Gneeecey have glued their captor—evil fugitive Nurse Maudlyn—to her own toilet using industrial-strength adhesive. But guilt (and her nonstop screaming) gets the better of them… so naturally, they decide to cook her a festive dead rubber chicken sautéed in cross-eyed cheese and random kitchen junk!

Yes, it's a meal only true villains—I mean, heroes—could serve with a straight face.

🎭 Inside Maudlyn’s wacky single-bathroom home, our two canine-humanoid oddballs argue over ethics, ESP, and whether they’ll ever see their interdimensional friend Nicki Rodriguez again. Meanwhile, with Perswayssick County in total disarray, a very questionable “dinner” is about to be served.

👾💥 If you love interdimensional comedy, ridiculous meals, talking dogs in superhero capes, alien antics, and toilet-based revenge plots—you’ve found your podcast.

🔔 Don’t forget to subscribe, like, and comment to keep up with the madness across Perswayssick County and beyond!

🪐🎧 New episodes every week! https://perswayssickradio.buzzsprout.com

Episode Artwork created by ChatGPT

#Comedy #fantasy # SciFi #dogs #dogsofInstagram #Podcast #VickiSola #hitchhikersgalaxyfans

We hope you enjoyed this week’s episode! We thank Marysol Rodriguez, Sal Solá, Sandi Solá, Marcellina Ramirez, Rick “El Molestoso” Rivera, Diane L., Brunie Cariño, Toni Aponte, and Aileen Bean for being generous supporting members through BuyMeACoffee.com.#ComedyPodcast #SciFiAdventure #FantasyPodcast

https://buymeacoffee.com/Perswayssick (Please support us with a one-time gift or monthly sponsorship amount—various levels available—to help keep us coming to you via BuyMeACoffee.com! We’ll shout you out during our podcast episodes and in our show notes here, plus supply you with more fun perks!)  

https://www.amazon.com/Vicki-Sola/e/B07J29RVMQ (Amazon Author Page, check out our Gneeecey/Nicki e-books and paperbacks!)

https://www.nfreads.com/interview-with-author-vicki-sola/

Transcript

Transcript / You Broke It, You Bought It, Pt. 1 – Episode 197, by Vicki Solá. 

All content © 2025 Perswayssick Radio: Unearthly Comedy.

Music/Intro: Hi there, I’m author and radio host Vicki Solá, welcoming you to Perswayssick Radio: Unearthly Comedy. I invite you to escape with me into the bizarre dimension of Perswayssick County, where wackiness rules! The laughs begin when I morph into my alter ego, radio DJ Nicki Rodriguez and clash with the zany, alien canine-humanoid Gneeecey! And now, I turn it over to my other self, Nicki, and the gang…. You Broke It, You Bought It, Pt. 1”

SFX: [Magic Spell] [Halloween Spooky & Fun Logo]

NARRATOR VICKI SOLÁ: In our last episode, “The Glue That Holds the Lousy Universe Together,” canine-humanoids Diroctor Bizzig “Zig” Gneeecey and Fleaglossitty “Flea” Floppinsplodge, also known as “Sooperflea,” currently held hostage in rotten fugitive Nurse Maudlyn’s single-bathroom-home, have spread industrial strength adhesive to her toilet, and have also glued the seat itself to her porcelain throne…producing intended results….

SFX: [Magic Spell] [Halloween Spooky & Fun Logo]

FLEAGLOSSITTY “FLEA” FLOPPINSPLODGE, AKA “SOOPERFLEA”: Listen, Zig—I think the ol’ battle ax is up!

DIROCTOR BIZZIG “ZIG” GNEEECEY: Yeah, Fleaglossitty—I don’t hear no more snorin’ comin’ from upstairs! 

NURSE MAUDLYN: Oh, I don’t know how long I was asleep. I do know I needed that rest. And now, I need the bathroom….

SFX: [Door Open] [Toilet Flush]

NM: Aaaaaaaahhhhhh! 

NARRATOR VICKI SOLÁ: A little while later, Gneeecey and Sooperflea sit in their man cave behind Nurse Maudlyn’s living room wall, regrouping….

SFX: [Magic Spell] [Halloween Music Box Cinematic Logo]

G: Y’know, Fleaglossitty, it’s priddy remarkabooble that our fully furnished man cave behind this lousy wall, is exactly the way we left it, last time we were prisoners here in the ol’ gasbag’s house.

F: Yeah, Zig. All the stuff we ordered from her computer is still here. Our little TV, an’ all our furniture.

G: An’ all our deckookerations, plus those new laptops, too. I hope her Wi-Fi is still workin’.

NM: Aaaaaaaahhhhhh! Aaaaaaaahhhhhh! 

G: Speakin’ of the ol’gasbag, hearin’ her scream like that is really getting’ on my very sensitive nerves.

F: Well, she is up there, stuck to her toilet, Zig.

G: Yeah, Fleaglossitty, for the forstinkable future. Now she knows what it’s stinkin’ like to be held hostage.

F: Y’know, Zig, I think we’re gonna hafta at least feed her.

G: Fleaglossitty, don’t tell me you’re feelin’ empoopathy for her.

F: No, Zig, but we gotta do what’s right. We can’t, y’know, let her starve to death. We’re better than that. I mean, we glued to her toilet. It’s kinda a case of we caused this, so we bought it.

G: Ya mean, like that sayin’,  you broke it, you bought it?

F: Exactly, Zig.

G: Kinda like when the Ig—

F: —ya mean Nicki—

G: Yeah, the Ig. Kinda like when she first invaded our dimension of Perswayssick County, an’ then she busted my beaudiful Gneeezle’s Restaurant’s lovely pink plaaastic Greek column into a zillion pieces, and so ’cause she broke it, she bought it?

F: Kinda, Zig…. Geewhizzicles, I got so much on my mind. Me, this county’s great superhero, I’m afraid to leave here. I’m afraid to even show my face at Area Fifty-an’-Four-Fourths ’cause I’ve really let Professor Wallbang down. ’Cause of you, Zig.

G: Don’t stinkin’ blame meee, Fleaglossitty, for your own glarin’ inepooptitude!

F: Ya should thank me, Zig!

G: For whaaat, Fleaglossitty?

F: For comin’ here to help ya! Professor Wallbang charged me wit’ overseein’ our Perswayssick Superhero Academy’s students’ refurbishin’ of that alien canine-humanoid Vloxx’s destroyed spaceship. 

G: Ya mean, my beaudiful Starship Waterloo!

F: Yeah, the one ya accidentally launched, wit’ us inside when ya hit the launch button instead of the lunch button. The ship that Nurse Maudlyn hijacked an’ crashed to pieces. I deserted Professor Wallbang, an’ left him an’ all them students in the lurch—all ’cause my new, improved superhero ESP tol’ me ya were in trouble, an’ directed me to where ya were! I’m even losin’ a teachin’ position he offered me—all ’cause of you! 

G: Fleaglossitty, are you stinkin’ accuseratin’ meee of bein’ ingratitudinous? An’ it ain’t my stinkin’ fault your dopey, failin’ superhero ESP improved! 

F: Imagine if it was just you, all alone wit’ Nurse Maudlyn in this house here right now. Ya weren’t doin’ too good when I arrived, were ya?

G: I do depreciate ya. Who woulda helped me hold up the terlit seat when I was gluin’ it to the terlit?

F: An’, ain’t ya worried ’bout Nicki? Will we ever see her again, now that she’s stuck in some other dimension? 

G: Funny…I been thinkin’ ’bout her lately….

F: Ain’cha worried ’bout our Perswayssick County? Bein’ Nicki’s gone, you’re Grate Gizzygalumpaggis again!

G: Ya mean,  Grate Gizzy, Fleaglossitty. Ya always forget how I’m tryin’ despooperately to conserve them valuable vowel an’ consonants!

F: Whatever, Zig! You’re our county’s leader again! An, don’t it bother ya that your evil double from Planet HyenaZitania, Ebegneeezer Gesundheit Eeeceygnay is probably runnin’ ’round, probably impersonatin’ ya? 

An’ what about the evil alien Markmen, an’ all them evil clowns lurkin’ in our wooded areas? An’ poor Grandma an’ Doctor Idnas must be worried sick ’bout all of us! An’ ya think anyone like Detective Clover is tryin’ to find us?

NM: Aaaaaaaahhhhhh! Aaaaaaaahhhhhh! 

F: We better go in the kitchen an’ prepare somethin’ for the ol’ battle axe so she’ll shut her big yapper. 

G: Yeah. Stinkin’ c’mon!

SFX: [Halloween Spooky & Fun Logo] [Sneakers Squeaking] 

G: Let’s see, Fleaglossitty…we could take her festive holiday gold glitter-sprayed dead rubber chicken down offa the kitchen wall here an’ cook it for her.

NM: Aaaaaaaahhhhhh! Aaaaaaaahhhhhh! 

F: But we ain’t got time to bake it. Be quicker to sauté it. 

G: Yeah. We can season it wit’ that grated cross-eyed cheese over there. Lemme see what she got in her kitchen here….

SFX: [Glass Shatter] [Glass Debris] [Bang] [Metal Crash] [TinCan] [CanTin] [Dish Ceramic] 

G: Here’s a whole buncha junk. We’ll save the better stuff for us. She should be glad we’re doin’ all this for her.

F: Dump it all in this pan here, Zig. 

SFX: [Glass Shatter] [Glass Debris] [Bang] [Metal Crash] [TinCan] [CanTin] [Splash]

F: Good. The more we give her now, the longer we’ll have a little peace. There…high heat. Love these gas stoves. The dead rubber chicken will melt sooner…. I’ll stir it a little bit….

SFX: [Glass Shatter] [Glass Debris] [Bang] [Metal Crash] [TinCan] [CanTin] [Barbecue Sizzle] [Fire Alarm]

NM: Aaaaaaaahhhhhh! Aaaaaaaahhhhhh! 

F: I think it’s ready. 

G: Yeah. Let’s dump it all in this big bowl an’ bring it up to the bathroom.

SFX: [metal Crash] Bang] [Splash] [CanTin] [Sneakers Squeaking] [HumanWalkUpstairs] [DoorPounds] [Door Open]

F: Din-din is served! Here! We made all this for you.

G: An’ we went to a whole lot of stinkin’ trouble to do it! 

NM: Aaaaaaaahhhhhh! Aaaaaaaahhhhhh! 

F: Looks like she’s lost for words!

SFX: [Human Hiccup] [Cartoon 1] [Magic Spell] [Misgivings & Misfortune]

NARRATOR VICKI SOLÁ: In next week’s episode, “You Broke It, You Bought It, Pt. 2,” we rejoin our protagonist, the dimension-burned Earthling human Nicki Rodriguez, who exists simultaneously in an alternate timeline after having merged accidentally with her double. Will these two timelines ever converge? Will Nicki, Gneeecey, and Sooperflea—and the rest of the Perswayssick County gang—ever see each other again?

SFX: [Magic Spell]

We hope you enjoyed this week’s episode! We thank Marysol Rodriguez, Sal Solá, Sandi Solá, Marcellina Ramirez, Rick “El Molestoso” Rivera, Diane L., Brunie Cariño, Toni Aponte, and Aileen Bean for being generous supporting members through BuyMeACoffee.com. 

And thank you for tuning in to “Perswayssick Radio: Unearthly Comedy.” We hope you enjoyed traveling to this loopy dimension with us and that you’ll come along again! Our new episodes drop every Tuesday! Please make sure to tell a friend! And keep on laughing! 

Frank: It’s a Gneeecey thing! [SFX: Door Slam] ###