“Flea Flies Again…and Again” – Episode 85
Freaked out by the sudden dematerialization of pal Zig Gneeecey and his double, “Sooperflea” Fleaglossitty Floppinsplodge finds out the hard way—literally—that his flying feature is indeed working again. He’s just smashed through the same closed, miraculously unbroken office window that his double had, minutes earlier.
We thank Marysol Rodriguez, Sandi Solá, Sal Solá, Marcellina Ramirez, Rick “El Molestoso” Rivera, Diane L., Brunie Cariño, Toni Aponte, and Aileen Bean and Sammie for being generous supporting members via BuyMeACoffee.com! We appreciate their sponsorship and support more than words can say!
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It's a one-woman show! Vicki does all the writing, character voices, and audio production!
Transcript / Flea Flies Again…and Again – Episode 85, written by Vicki Solá.
All content © 2023 Perswayssick Radio: Unearthly Comedy.
Music/Intro: Hi there, I’m author and radio host Vicki Solá, welcoming you to Perswayssick Radio: Unearthly Comedy. I invite you to escape with me into the bizarre dimension of Perswayssick County, where wackiness rules! The laughs begin when I morph into my alter ego, radio DJ Nicki Rodriguez and clash with the zany, alien canine-humanoid Gneeecey! And now, I turn it over to my other self, Nicki, and the gang….
SFX: [Magic Spell] [Halloween Cinematic Logo]
NARRATOR VICKI SOLÁ: In our last episode, “More Double Trouble,” earthling Nicki Rodriguez confronts her double, despite “Sooperflea” Fleaglossitty Floppinsplodge and Zig Gneeecey’s desperate pleas not to. They believe she might unwittingly get everyone killed if, in fact, that other Nicki has materialized from an antimatter universe. Ignoring Flea and Gneeecey, citing that she refuses to be afraid of herself, Nicki challenges and makes physical contact with her hostile doppelganger, and the two disappear into thin air.
Freaked out, the two canine-humanoids high-tail it to Gneeecey’s GAS Broadcast Network located on Edgar Vompt Boulevard. Much to their horror, when they enter Gneeecey’s personal office, the first thing they see is Gneeecey’s double, sitting with his feet up on his desk. To make matters worse, the door slams shut—and locks—right behind them. Sooperflea’s double spots the two of them and panics—flying out through a closed window. Sooperflea interrupts Gneeecey’s argument with his lookalike to inform him that his long-missing, cash-stuffed teddy bear Yammicles is sitting on the desk in plain sight. The other Gneeecey, of course, refuses to hand the bear over, claiming that it’s his. So, our Gneeecey decides to take matters into his own four-fingered hands….
“FLEA” FLEAGLOSSITTY FLOPPINSPLODGE, AKA “SOOPERFLEA”: Zig! Nooo! Remember what happened to Nicki when she confronted her double? This other you here is probably made of antimatter particles! That teddy bear could be an antimatter double, too!
DIROCTOR BIZZIG “ZIG” GNEEECEY: I ain’t losin’ two zillion bucks in cash!
F: Ya could kill yourself! An’ me!
G: I could die wit’out my mon-ney! My mon-ney or my life…my mon-ney or my life... Ya lousy make-believe fake meee, here I come! Get your filthy haaands offa my bear!
G2: You’ll hafta take him outta my filthy haaands!
G: I stinkin’ will then!
SFX: [Sneakers Squeaking]
F: Zig—nooooo!
SFX: [Sci-Fi Laser] [Laser] [Magic Glitter]
F: Holy Saint Bogelthorpe! They all jus’ disappeared! Zig, his double, an’ that teddy bear—they’re all gone! SFX: [Logo Eerie Sharp] I am so outta here! SFX: [Sneakers Squeaking] [Large Shatter Window] [Glass Shatter] [Terror Tension] [Logo Eerie Sharp] [Magic Spell] [Logo Eerie Sharp]
NARRATOR VICKI SOLÁ: And just as his double did minutes before, our Sooperflea panics and flies out through the same closed window…which, like before, makes a shattering sound but miraculously doesn’t actually break….
SFX: [Magic Spell] [Large Shatter Window] [Glass Shatter]
F: Holy Saint Bogelthorpe—my superhero flyin’ feature is workin’ again! Zig should see this—I’m flyin’! But I don’t understand. How come his office window jus’ sounded like it got all busted but really didn’t now, or when that double of mine crashed through it?
SFX: [Crows]
F: There go a buncha my pals, the crows. An’ I’m sure they’re winkin’ at me! I’ve always been so real nice to ’em, feedin’ ’em peanuts every day. I’m sure they know who I am! I read that crows remember people that are nice to ’em. Hi, guys! SFX: [Crows] Zig always gets mad at me for feedin’ ’em…says I’m encouragin’ ’em to be pests! He should know. He’s a pest….
SFX: [Helicopter]
F: Uh-oh—got a little close to that helicopter there! Jus’ reduced my altitude a bit. An’ as long as I’m talkin’ to myself, I oughtta ask myself, where in Bogelthorpe’s name am I goin’? I jus’ know I gotta get away from our doubles! Can’t go back to Zig’s mansion. Can’t go back to Doctor Idnas’s office Or Gneeezles. Or Zig’s office. Or my apartment on Veggie Burger Avenue…. Lookin’ down, I see that telltale trail of brown liquid…ah, the scenic Perswayssick River. Looks like unflushed terlit water...as usual. Don’t know why Zig loves it so much… An’ there’s the Perswayssick Occasional Overland Passenger Train, better known as POOPT. Looks like a slitherin’ silver worm — SFX: [Mud Splash] Uh-oh—what’s that that jus’ slapped my noggin? Oh, I see him flyin’ away…the bluebird of crappiness. Didn’t even know they flew this high…oh well… that’s good luck…or some kinda luck…I guess….
SFX: [Pouring Rain with a Thunderstorm]
F: Uh-oh—a storm!
SFX: [Crows]
F: An’ look, my buddies, the crows, are flyin’ over me, keepin’ me dry like a big black umbrella. Thanks, guys! An’, yupperooney! Back into the sunshine! Wow—looky down there, below! I see that forest of electric-blue weepin’ willows! An’ there’s Lake Gizzagoola—looks like a sapphire! That means I’m flyin’ over Perswayssick County’s beaudiful region of Booolabeeezia.
SFX: [Crows]
F: I’ll jus’ keep flyin’ straight ahead wit’ my buddies, the crows. I might as well head over to Zig’s high-tech cabin hidden high up in Booolabeeezia’s wooded mountains. Zig always accuses me of talkin’ to myself, but it helps me to get stuff straight in my mind. An’ I don’t interrupt myself the way he constantly does. Now, when I really think of it, of course, Nicki was right. If those other three of us—the other Zig, her, an me—were actually antimatter, everything would’ve been destroyed—that mutual annihilation—would’ve occurred as soon as they made contact wit’ our world. For Bogelthorpe’s sake, we were taught that in our second semester at the superhero academy—Matter 101. I owe Nicki an apology. Nicki…poor Nicki…
SFX: {Cartoon Character Annoyed Crying]
F: Gotta get a grip on myself—no time to be cryin’!
SFX:[Propeller Plane] [Superpower FlyBy]
F: Oh, boy—another close call! Jus’ missed them two little prop planes! Y’know, talkin’ to myself keeps me from gettin’ lonely up here…. I wonder, how come there’s two of Zig, Nicki, an’ me, but only one Yammicles the teddy bear. Is there another Yammicles? If so, where is he? Zig is right. If there were two of his cash-stuffed bears, he’d have twice as much money…. I wonder…that rotten Nurse Maudlyn, that real mean lady that kidnapped Yammicles…I wonder if she had anything to do wit’ all of this…. Nah, I don’t think she’s smart enough…. What about her creepy sidekick, that Doctor Frombilagonga? Nah, I don’t think he’s smart enough, either…. All this thinkin’—I’m hittin’ a brick wall—no—I’m hittin’ a tree—head-on! Holy Saint Bogelthorpe!
SFX: [Passing Swoosh Exploding] [Wood Demolition] [Crunching Leaves]
F: Ow! Zig always said thinkin’ too much would be my downfall! An’ I’m still goin’ down—spinnin’ outta control—gonna hit the ground way down there—haaaalp!
SFX: [Superpower FlyBy] [Crows]
F: My buddies! They jus’ did what must’ve been a seventy-mile-an-hour dive—they jus’ swooped down under me before I hit the ground, an’ now they’re flyin’ me up to the top of the cliff…an’ there’s Zig’s secret high-tech vacation cabin! Thanks, guys! Next time I see youse, I’ll feed youse all the peanuts youse can eat! SFX: [Crows] Oh, my head hurts—I need to ice it. That tree trunk was pretty hard.
SFX: [Magic Spell]
F: Holy Saint Bogelthorpe…this place looks untouched. That GAS-TV Channel Three-an’-a-half news copter that Zig crashed into this place months ago is still lodged in that big picture window. Guess he never found anyone to fix all this for a cheap enough price. That’s our Zig…. An’ strange. The side door that leads into the kitchen—it’s open. Well, lemme go in an’ take a look ’round. SFX: [Squeaking Sneakers] Hmmm…a couple of black feathers there on the floor….
SFX: [Squeaking Sneakers] [Logo Eerie Sharp]
F: Holy Saint Bogelthorpe—there’s the other me—sittin’ in the livin’ room, watchin’ TV!
TV SHOW: And so, we unwittingly relinquish our planet to the ever-resilient cockroach.
SFX: [Music Eerie Sad Orchestra]
F: Oh boy…. That must be a documentary about Nicki’s planet.
TV ANNOUNCER: And stay tuned for GAS-TV Channel Three-an’-a-half news! Top story: Stummix Bank may be going belly-up! But, first, a word from our sponsors.
F: An’ look, the other me—he’s got an ice pack sittin’ on top of his noggin! Does the back of my head really look that funny? Are my ears really that long? Uh-oh, jus’ my luck—the other me—he’s gettin’ up, an’ he’s headed toward the kitchen here!
SFX: [Orchestra Cliffhanger] [Magic Spell]
We hope you enjoyed this week’s episode! We thank Marysol Rodriguez, Sal Solá, Sandi Solá, Marcellina Ramirez, Rick “El Molestoso” Rivera, Diane L., Brunie Cariño, Toni Aponte, and Aileen Bean for being generous supporting members through BuyMeACoffee.com.
And thank you for tuning in to “Perswayssick Radio: Unearthly Comedy.” We hope you enjoyed traveling to this loopy dimension with us and that you’ll come along again! Our new episodes drop every Tuesday morning! Please make sure to tell a friend! And keep on laughing!
Frank: It’s a Gneeecey thing! [SFX: Door Slam] ###